Recently, a woman journeyed from northern Ghana to Accra and stormed into her son’s home — unannounced and clearly upset. Her daughter-in-law knew right away that this was no friendly visit. The elderly woman refused every courtesy, even a glass of water.
When her son returned from work, his mother wasted no time: she demanded that his wife leave the house. In her view, the young woman had turned her son against her. The wife broke down in tears, insisting that she had done nothing wrong — she even supported the household financially and sometimes borrowed from her own parents to keep things running.
Her husband stood silently, torn between two powerful loves: the woman who gave him life and the woman who shares it.
👩👦 Your Mother
Your mother carried you in her womb for nine months. She fed, bathed, and nurtured you when you were helpless. Every step you take today began with her sacrifices. She is your first teacher, your first love, and the only mother you will ever have.
Now that you are grown, she looks to you for care and gratitude — and she deserves it. Honoring your mother is not just a duty; it’s a moral and spiritual responsibility.
👩❤️👨 Your Wife
When you marry, you become one flesh with your wife. She is your partner, your confidante, the mother of your children, and the backbone of your home. Together, you share joy, struggles, and dreams.
Marriage does more than bind hearts — it strengthens the body and mind. Studies show that married people tend to live longer, enjoy better health, and achieve greater financial stability. In Ghanaian society, marriage also brings respect and a sense of belonging.
⚖️ The Real Challenge
In our culture, a man stands between two worlds — the family he was born into and the family he builds. By tradition, your mother remains part of your extended family, while your wife is considered an outsider — yet she is the one who gives you children and builds your future with you.
Many mothers see their sons as their “little husbands,” and this emotional bond can become possessive, especially when a mother is widowed or unhappy in her own marriage. Any woman who seems to “take her son away” is easily viewed as a rival.
In Akan, many wives call their mothers-in-law “asew korafo” — a term that means both mother and competitor. Some mothers even admit that they cry in private when their sons marry.
For a man, this creates a lifelong tug-of-war — between loyalty to his mother and devotion to his wife. Balancing the two requires wisdom, maturity, and faith.
🙏 The Divine Order
According to God’s design, marriage comes with a clear instruction: “A man shall leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”
This means your wife must take priority — above your mother, your children, your friends, or anyone else. When you honor your wife, you honor God’s plan for your life.
Think of it this way: if you had to vote, that vote must go to your wife. You and she are one — voting for her is voting for yourself. Let your father cast his vote for your mother.
If you side with your mother over your wife, you lose both. But when you stand with your wife, God’s blessings overflow — touching not only your marriage but your mother, your family, and generations to come.
So, each day, no matter the situation, choose your wife — with love, respect, and faith.
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